So you're goin' no contact.

Might as well do that shit like a boss.

Leslie Quigless

Jun 11, 2025

I’ve white-knuckled it through no-contact before. Been doubled over in agony the whole time—hi, 20s and 30s!

(Know someone going through a break-up? Forward this to them!)

The problem with doing no-contact this way is that even if you finish perfectly, with not one slip-up, not even a glance at the person’s social media—you’ll find yourself either:

going back to the person; or
enacting the very same dynamic with another person.

This same truth applies to going no-contact from groups—groups of friends, a cult, family members, etc.

You won’t go back or repeat the pattern because you’re weak, or masochistic, or defective, or did something wrong.

You are relegated to, choiceless in, going back or going through the very same shit with someone else because you haven’t healed—you haven’t seen—the pattern that’s quietly (unconsciously) at work behind the scenes.

All you have to do to heal a pattern…is see it.

You really can’t do anything to or about a pattern. You can’t kill it. The harder you try to get rid of it, the more desperate you become, the more it shows up—because it’s coming up in order to be seen.

Seeing is the only healing that sticks.

We skip over seeing and do everything else except seeing because seeing is so simple.

But it’s the only thing that works. And it is so simple.

I teach you exactly how to do it—how to see a pattern, how to see and be with your pain—in this 10-minute video. We practice together.

And The Gospel of Pleasure Deep Pleasure no-contact route is so goddamn cool.

So deeply healing.

Nourishing.

Life-affirming.

And you’ll see that it begins working in real time as we practice here.

And if you do exactly what I tell you in this 10-min vid, you just might be able to sprinkle on juuuuust the right amount of petty, too.

And you won’t even be trying to be petty.

You’ll just be a deeply healin’-ass human who no longer—well, you’ll see what I’m talking about in the vid.